Finding My Lost Mother in My Little Niece A Feeling of Exile Life.

Exile life means the name of a loneliness even in the midst of thousands of people it feels like there is an empty space inside the chest that no one can ever fill. That emptiness is felt the most when we lose our dearest one my mother It's been one year and five months now I haven’t heard her voice. how long it's been since I called out Ma I just can’t anymore A lot has changed in this one year but what hasn't changed is the absence of my mother. Her smile affection scolding and blessings still seem to float around me only I can’t touch them. Losing my mother feels like I ve lost a part of my soul In the busyness of work here in exile maybe sometimes the mind forgets. But when the night grows quiet my heart feels empty and my mother's voice still echoes Have you eaten Are you well I ve carried this weight in my heart for so long. Then one day a blessing arrived in the arms of my elder brother his daughter a tiny fairy. In her face I saw the shadow of my mother The day I saw her for the first time I said Ma Yes I call her Ma.

This little baby is only three months old but her tiny smile her one glance in all of it I find a new form of my mother. I talk to her cuddle her play with her and call her Ma Maybe she doesn't understand anything yet. but I feel an unexplainable peace In calling this little niece Ma it feels like I m reclaiming my lost mother once again. In her soft skin in the way she tries to grasp with her tiny fingers in her baby sounds I find the warmth of my mother's embrace. Many may say it’s odd to call a baby Ma but can feelings of the heart ever be explained. I know I’ll never get my mother back but in this little soul I’ve learned to live again It feels like a shadow of my mother’s love has come to shelter me.

Every morning when I see her on video call my heart fills with joy All tiredness all sorrow disappears in a moment Ma what are you doing. when I say this and look at her I feel an indescribable peace inside myself This little Ma is now my only comfort. In the pain of exile in the absence of my mother just one smile from her lights up my world. Not everyone may find someone through whom they can rediscover someone they’ve lost. I am lucky that my brother’s daughter has given me that opportunity of love I know that when she grows up. I’ll tell her the story of this Ma calling I’ll say You are not just my brother’s daughter you were also my mother my reason to survive.

Actually a mother is not limited to an age or a form mother means love shelter trust and peace. This little child has given me that peace given me the courage to love life again. I write this thinking deeply about my mother And with the vision of my little Ma in front of me. I know a mother’s love lives forever within someone somewhere I have found that love in the eyes of my little niece. And so I call her Ma You are the greatest gift of my life. Even in the harsh journey of exile how a tiny soul can fill a deep emptiness. I realize that every day Perhaps this is how life shows us the way of love through our pain and gives us new hope to live again.

Thank you everyone for reading my post.

@baizid123